1/28/14 - Cleared for Radiation

I had my three month MUGA scan yesterday. I haven't gotten the results yet. The technician said she didn't see anything I should worry about, which is good news. I've been cleared to start radiation. The second part of my simulation is scheduled for next Wednesday, Feb. 5th. I was told they will most likely start treatment on that day as well. I'm optimistic that I will get through rads with no major side effects. I've got a Herceptin infusion coming up on Tuesday, Feb. 4th. I'm thinking about taking up residence at the doctors office. I'm sure they can make a small space for me to sleep. I would save so much money on gas! Oh well, that's the price you pay for living out in the boondocks. I'm developing awesome driving skills. I've learned to move over quickly when someone is flashing their lights at me. I've never been flipped off so much in my life. I find it puzzling to be going 75-80 on a 70 mph freeway, and still have people get ticked off . It's not like I'm granny behind the wheel. Who really needs to go 90 mph? Crazy drivers!! Hope you're all having an awesome week so far.

Thanks for checking on me.

Beppy

1/23/14 - Lump Was Benign :)

My surgeon called me this evening to let me know the lump was benign. I'm so relieved I don't have to start this process over again. On to radiation! I never thought I'd be so excited to have my bosoms fried. Thank you for all of the texts, calls, prayers and positive thoughts. It means more than you know. :)

Cheers,

Beppy

1/23/14 - It's All About the Hair (Progress of Hair Growth)

PROGRESS OF HAIR GROWTH - LAST CHEMO WAS ON 11/4/13


January 10, 2014 - Almost 10 Weeks From Last Chemo

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January 23, 2014 - Almost 12 Weeks From Last Chemo

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March 8, 2014 - Almost 18 Weeks From Last Chemo

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1/22/14 - Another Day, Another Lump



It's been a busy couple of weeks. I had my Herceptin infusion on Tuesday, the 14th. My lovely nurse Christine, had a difficult time getting in my vein. I guess they are getting tired of being poked. We ended up having to use the surgery arm which I'm hoping is ok. I guess time will tell.


 
Robyn and Michael in Monterey, CA

We drove to Northern California on Friday morning to visit Robyn. We stopped on our way in and took her to lunch. After lunch we drove to our hotel. We stayed at the Toll House in Los Gatos. It's a cute little hotel surrounded by shops and restaurants and if you're ever in that area, it's a great place to stay - very clean. It was our first vacation after all this cancer stuff, and it was so nice to get away. Friday night we stayed close to the hotel and Robyn and Michael met us for dinner. Saturday we drove to Monterey and spent some time on Cannery Row.  Then we drove to Carmel to see the ocean. We got up very early on Sunday, had breakfast with Robyn & Michael, and started the trek back home. The whole weekend went by way too quickly. I was happy I finally got to see Robyn's new apartment. It's really adorable and she has it decorated so nice. It was a great trip. Wouldn't it be nice to stay on vacation forever?

Beppy & BudBud in Monterey, CA
 
So, back to reality on Monday morning. I had my ultrasound appointment at 10:30 a.m. and the second part of my radiation simulation at 2:15 p.m.  They quickly determined the lump I was feeling was not a seroma. The tech showed the results to the doctor and we all know the next step by now - US core needle biopsy. I was shocked and stunned. It felt like someone kicked me in the gut. The one test I absolutely hate and they want to do it again. I don't have enough adjectives to describe how I was feeling. Defeated, lost, distraught - I could go on and on.  My last core needle biopsy hurt so badly, I just knew I couldn't do another one. My surgeon came down during my test and I begged her to just cut it out. Surgery I can handle, another biopsy was just out of the question. Of course, I didn't get my way. They scheduled an ultrasound guided core needle biopsy for the next day. UGGGGGGGGGG. I cried the whole way home. In fact, I cried most of the day and most of the night. What a wuss. I'm not sure if I was crying about the test, or that I felt like I was starting all over again from the beginning. I also felt ticked off. I did everything they asked of me, chemo, surgery and was on my way to radiation and there it was - another lump. Do I have some kind of lump making machine in me? Like on I Love Lucy when the chocolates keep coming by, and you can't catch them quickly enough to package them.  The chocolates are my lumps! So yesterday, I went kicking and screaming into the radiology department. I felt like a two year old. I took two Ativan before the procedure - suggested by my surgeon. That made me even more emotional - I was like a blubbering idiot. I was on the table and just got up and told them I can't do it. It was just so painful last time - I just can't do it. Let me just say, the team I had was amazing. They explained that the doctor I was having that day was very gentle and goes very slow. This wasn't one of my finer moments in life. I felt like a puddle of jelly. As I was getting ready to get up and leave, guess who walks in - yep, my surgeon. The same lady that held my hand last time (bless her heart). I knew once she walked in it was all over. She's like a bulldog and she wasn't letting me out of that room. For the second time, she kept me calm and held my hand. The doctor came in (he looked really young), and was very nice and understood my bad experience from last time. The team convinced me to go through with the test. I'm not sure why there was such a difference. I have to attribute this mostly to the doctor, but the test didn't hurt at all this time. He used a ton of lidocaine, and didn't rush like the last doctor did. When he made the first click and I didn't feel anything, I told him I loved him. In fact, at that point, I loved the whole team and told them so. It was such a relief. He got four cores out of a tiny lump of 6mm. I should know whether the cancer has returned by Friday, January 24th.

I thought I was fairly stoic throughout this whole process. From originally finding the two lumps, through testing, to diagnosis, and then the start of treatment. I'm not sure why I broke down at this point. Maybe because I was so close to being done, with only radiation left. Maybe it's the reality that now every little lump and pain can lead to a higher stage of breast cancer, or maybe everything just hit me all at once. I feel guilty for being weak - I'm typically not an emotional person, although I did cry when I lost my hair. I think it was the culmination of everything. Having to have another Core needle biopsy felt like I was starting over again. All I could picture was the mouse on a wheel.

While that certainly wasn't one of my proudest moments, I'm sharing this for anyone else that has to go down this path. My tantrum, emotional outbreak or whatever you want to call it, is over. I've given myself  permission to be a cry baby and a wuss, as long as I don't make it a habit. :) Today is a new day.

I'm optimistic that my results will be good and show no new cancer. If it is cancer again, there is nothing I can do to change it, so I will deal with whatever comes up. Not because of strength or courage but because what other option is there?

So the point of this post, is to have your bitchy, whiny, tantrums when you need them, then it's time to get over it, and do what you have to do. Onward and upward - well, hopefully not upward just yet  <evil grin>.

And by the way, radiation has been put on hold until we know what we are dealing with. Thanks for checking on me!

Cheers,

Beppy


1/11/13 - Radiation Simulation - Part One



First, I would like to wish everyone a Happy New Year. I hope 2014 is a great year for everyone.

Now, on to radiation news. Yesterday I had (part one) of my radiation simulation. It took me about an hour to get there (traffic was good). I arrived at 8:45 a.m. and they called me in at 9:15. The appointment took a little over an hour. I took a picture of the CT machine. I had to disrobe from the waist up and wear that lovely gown they provide with the opening to the back. The female technician asked me to lay face up on the table, with my left arm above my head, in the arm holder. You can see the arm holders in the picture. I couldn't put my right arm above my head because I have a shoulder that pops out of the socket. Therefore, I will be doing rads with one arm above my head, and the other down by my side. She asked me to put my right hand in my pocket. She said this would help keep me still. Once she had me positioned correctly, she exposed my left breast. At that time she taped little wires along my surgical scar. She said they do that so they know where the scar is when doing the scan. Then she left the room and started the scan. During this time you can't move. I was scanned for about 10-15 minutes before she came back into the room. At that point I still had to keep my arm above my head while she marked my breast with a sharpie. Then the Radiology Oncologist (RO) came in and made his own marks. Finally I was able to relax my arm for a few minutes. Next the technician removed the arm holders and changed to a different pad and had me lay on my side with the same arm extended above my head. This time she had me place my left hand on my head, and my right arm was down by my side. Then she left the room and scanned me again. Personally I think she put me in that position so they can go in their little room and make fun of me. I must have looked so ridiculous with my arm extended over my head with my hand resting on it. That scan took another 10-15 minutes. I guess the radiologist didn't like that position, so they went back to the other position with the arm holders. They scanned me again which took another 10-15 minutes. Then they doodled on me a little more. Next the technician  took pictures with her camera. They do that so they know what position you were in for next time. They put a mark on my right side and covered it with clear tape. They put three marks down my middle and two marks on my left side and covered them with clear tape also. When I shower I'm supposed to avoid those areas. They will use those marks for placement when they tattoo me. If you're claustrophobic the scan should be pretty easy. As you can see by the picture, the tunnel is very small. I have a return appointment (Part 2) for the 20th of January. At that time they will tattoo me and do a dry run. They will also give me my radiation schedule on that day. I had to give them a two hour window for when I would like my appointment. That's pretty much it. The hardest part was keeping my arm over my head for so long.

I've developed a lump at the 6:00 position in my left breast. The surgeon looked at it this week, and she thinks it may be a seroma (fluid buildup) which developed from the surgery. To be sure, she ordered another ultrasound. They are trying to get that scheduled as quickly as possible. My RO said he will not start radiation until they know the results of that test. I'm hoping it's not another tumor after all of this. If so, I'll be pretty ticked off. I had blood work today and everything looked good. I have my Herceptin infusion on Monday.

I had a wonderful Christmas with my family.  Robyn flew home on Christmas Eve and Mike had Chrstmas day off. We stayed in our jammies most of the day and cooked lasagna and spaghetti. After dinner we went to Peg's for dessert and I really enjoyed spending time with the kids. It was a wonderful holiday and I was sad to see it end but I am glad to put 2013 behind me.

That's all for now. Thanks for checking on me.

Cheers,

Beppy

Special thanks to Tricia and Sharon for driving out to see me over the Christmas holiday. It was great to see both of you! Thanks for making that long drive.

1/6/14 - What I Did to Combat Chemo Side Effects



It took me forever to write this blog. This is what I did, and in some cases am still doing to eliminate chemo side effects. You should always check with your oncologist before trying any remedy. Not all of us are the same and what worked for me, may not work for you.

Here is a list of side effects, that I was told by my doctors, could happen during chemo:

Constipation - By far, my biggest side effect. In fact, if I didn't have this side effect, I think I may have become a chemo queen. I've been prone to constipation all of my life so I knew it would be a challenge. My oncologist had me take two Colace capsules in the morning and two Senna tablets at night. Unfortunately towards the end it stopped working and I ended up in the ER with impacted bowels. I was also encouraged to drink 8-10 glasses of water a day. My bowels were back to normal (meaning normal for me) about 4 weeks post chemo. To combat it now, I eat a bowl of Fiber One Cereal every morning along with a glass of Plum Smart Juice, which seems to keep me pretty regular. I've found pears to work really well too. I'm not a water person, but I've become one since chemo. DRINK, DRINK, DRINK - it really does help flush out all those chemo toxins.

Intestinal Pain - Primarily caused by the constipation and blockage. The ER doctor prescribed a powder  (GoLYTELY) that I mixed with Crystal Light. It didn't taste too bad and it worked within an hour. I camped out in the bathroom all night, but boy did it work. I think they should change the name though - GoQUICKLY or perhaps Go-A-LOTLY. In fact, you may want to install a seat belt on the toilet if it's ever prescribed to you. My intestinal pain went away after clearing out my bowels. 

Diarrhea - Not a side effect I experienced. My oncologist told me to take Imodium A-D  if it happened.

Fatigue - This was a cumulative side effect. I was pretty used to fatigue because of my RA, so it wasn't awful. But for a healthy person, I imagine it could hit pretty hard. I did sleep a lot during certain times - it usually hit me about the third day after an infusion and lasted about a week. After my last infusion it lasted a lot longer. Walking seemed to help a lot but it was difficult for me to get motivated. My fatigue started getting better right before my lumpectomy. That would make it about four weeks post chemo. Eight weeks post chemo and I'm pretty much back to normal. That will probably change once radiation starts.

Hemorrhoids - I was really concerned about hemorrhoids for obvious reasons (read my history). They stared to bother me after my first infusion but they seemed to get better as I went along. For this I used Preparation H wipes which work very well for irritation and inflammation. After my second chemo they were pretty much under control, just a little bothersome. Every little flare up made me a little wacky.

Muscle & Bone Pain - Caused by the wonderful Neupogen and Neulasta shot. The doctor switched after my first chemo from Neupogen to Neulasta. I had slight pain with the Neupogen but it really got bad with the Neulasta. My limbs felt like tree trunks and I came to dread every shot. At the same time, I was thankful that it eventually increased by blood counts. It was a love/hate relationship. Giving myself the injection was pretty easy. When I injected the Neupogen, I alternated from different sides of my abdomen. When I injected the Neulasta, I switched to the upper portion of my leg. I would alternate from one leg to the other. The upper portion of my leg was much easier for me to inject and didn't bother me as much. For pain I took Claritin which seemed to help a little. The muscle and bone pain got better about 2 weeks post chemo but has recently returned. It was pretty bad after my first Herceptin only infusion and has slowly been getting better. I actually broke down and took a pain pill (Norco) and that seemed to help. However, the pain pill did cause a slight rash and itching. For the rash I took Benedryl.

Rash and Itching - I developed a severe rash after my surgery. Before calling the doctor I tried Benedryl at night and Claritin during the day. That didn't help at all. Next I tried Aquaphor which was unsuccessful. As a last resort I tried Calamine Lotion which seemed to help right out of the shower. The relief was short lived though. The doctor prescribed Triamcinolone Acetonide 0.1% topical cream. It did nothing for me. Then she prescribed Betamethasone, Augmented 0.05% topical cream which worked much better. With the new prescription it took about one to two weeks to fully clear up.

Loss of Hair - I wish I had a magic potion for this side effect. I know many people use cold caps which can be controversial. I never really lost my hair completely. I had a light fuzz all around my head. I lost the hair under my arms and eventually the hair on my legs. Also lost the hair down south - I'm sure you get the picture. I kept my eyebrows, and my eyelashes thinned just a bit. I eventually lost all of my nose hair.

Eight weeks post chemo and my eyebrows are actually starting to thin - very strange. The hair on my head is starting to fill in a bit more. My leg hair is back - I have to shave about once a week. The hair under my arms has grown a tiny bit - I've only had to shave once. Down south hasn't grown at all and my eyelashes are about the same. My nose hair hasn't grown back.

Nausea - It was rare that I felt any nausea. When I did, the doctor prescribed Zofran and that seemed to do the trick. He also prescribed Compazine which I used once. I didn't like the way it made me feel - it made me dizzy. He also prescribed Marinol which is supposed to help with nausea and appetite. Because Zofran worked so well for me, and I obviously didn't have any problems with my appetite (gained 13 pounds), I never used the Marinol.

Vomiting - I vomited one time after my first infusion, which was caused by the pain pill I took on an empty stomach. Before and after every chemo I tried to eat small meals.

Dry Skin - Shortly after my first infusion I started getting these big dry patches on my face. I tried all kinds of creams and lotions and nothing worked. After a lot of experimenting I finally found a great regimen that actually improved my skin. At night I would wash my face with CeraVe and after that I applied Cetaphil (in a jar). Now here is where I made a wonderful discovery - in the morning, instead of washing my face with CeraVe cleanser, I washed my face with CeraVe lotion. I'd put it all over my face and wet a wash cloth. Then I would go in a circular motion with the wash cloth and wipe it off. When I did that, it would take all the dry skin off.  At that point, if I wasn't going to wear makeup that day, I would apply more Cetaphil. If makeup was going on, I would apply Lancome Bienfait Multi-Vital Sunscreen Cream which I got in the makeup class given by the American Cancer Society (Look Good... Feel Better). My skin is better than it was before chemo. I'm hoping the Lancome product isn't too expensive because I would really like to continue using it. 

Acne - I developed horrible acne after my first infusion. Look under dry skin (see above) and see my routine. It worked for acne too. Cleared it right up.

Neuropathy - I've always had a bit of neuropathy from past surgeries. A couple of the toes on my left foot would get numb and tingly and I have a portion of my left leg where they removed tissue for my reconstruction which is completely numb. I did fairly well during chemo, until I had my last infusion. At that time my whole left foot went numb and tingly and it affected my right foot but not as bad. I also had problems with my hands. It really affected my fine motor skills making it difficult to button my shirt. Luckily it only lasted  about a week post chemo. I'm not sure how it would have been, if I had continued with all six infusions they originally wanted me to have. I didn't find anything to counteract the neuropathy. It went away before I could address the problem with my oncologist. Eight weeks post chemo and I just have the same neuropathy I've always had.

Mouth Sores - Before chemo I made an appointment with my dentist and had a thorough cleaning. During chemo I brushed and flossed after each meal. I used, and still use Biotene toothpaste. I also made sure to always have water on hand, and kept my mouth moist. I carried a water bottle with me wherever I went. I was fortunate not to develop mouth sores. My doctor prescribed, MW: Diphen-Lido Visc-Maalox-NYST Oral Susp. - where do they get these names? Fortunately, I never had to use it so I can't say whether it works or not.

Low Blood Counts - This is a side effect I did have all through chemo. To counteract I used Neupogen which didn't work too well for me, so I was switched to Neulasta.

Low Ejection Fraction - Ejection Fraction measures how well your heart is pumping. This can be a side effect of taking Herceptin which is a targeted therapy for HER2+ tumors. The doctors keep a pretty close eye on your heart during treatment, ordering a Muga Scan every three months. My ejection fraction did drop but came back up pretty quickly after skipping a dose of Herceptin. The research I did indicated that 30 minutes of exercise a day can help improve your ejection fraction. I started walking 30 minutes a day and it seemed to help mine. Lowering your salt intake can also help.  I have another Muga Scan scheduled for the end of January.

Abnormal Liver Enzymes - When my ALT test was elevated I got really concerned that either my liver was damaged or the cancer had metastasized. Then I learned an elevated ALT could be a side effect of chemo. I immediately stopped taking Norco because it contains Tylenol, which can damage your liver. When I had my next blood test, it was back to normal. It got slightly elevated again during chemo, but always came right back down.



Fingernails Turn Black or Lift - I never had this side effect. Throughout my treatment, I kept my toenails painted and I put Sally Hansen Hard as Nails on my fingernails. I also had a pedicure during chemo, making sure my counts were up before I went. I let them trim my toenails but didn't let them cut the cuticles. I kept my fingernails very short. Eight weeks post chemo I have a slight line in the middle of my fingernails. It's barely noticeable. If you look closely, you can see the new growth is a slightly different color than the old growth. You've really got to be looking closely to notice.

Watery Eyes and Blurred Vision - This is a side effect I did get. It seemed to be worse right after an infusion and it lasted about a week. My oncologist told me to use Restore Tears. I bought the product, but never used it. I hate putting things in my eyes. I had it on hand in case it got unbearable - which it didn't.

Bloody/Cracked Nose - Got this one. I think because everything dries out so much, your nose gets bloody and cracked. I read on various support sites to use aquaphor. I asked my oncologist about it, and he wasn't too keen about me putting stuff in my nose. He said you have to be careful because it can be absorbed into your lung and cause problems. That's all I needed to hear. I lived with the bloody/cracked nose. I tried to moisten it with water in the morning and that seemed to help. It took about one week after each chemo for that to subside.

Runny Nose - Another side effect I have. I've read on the internet that it's caused by the Herceptin. That remains to be seen. Right now it seems that it's caused by lack of nose hair. There really isn't anything there to stop it. I'll have to report back on this one once the hair in my nose starts to grow. Then I can tell you if it's the Herceptin. In the meantime, I carry a tissues. It's not a constant drip for me - it's occasional.

Chemo Brain - I'm not sure I'm experiencing this or not. Occasionally I will be doing a task and start another task ,while in the middle of the other one. That could just be old-timers disease - I'm really not sure. I don't feel like it's much different than before I started chemo, except for the fact I'm more aware of it. I guess the jury's still out on this one.

Infection - I'm happy to report I've experienced no infections while on chemo. Yipeeeeeeeeeee! Must be the antibiotics they pumped in me after every chemo infusion or it could be I'm a neurotic nutcase when it comes to spreading germs. I wore a mask when I entered any type of medical facility while my counts were down. I also used a ton of hand sanitizer. When I wasn't using hand sanitizer, I was washing my hands. I stayed away from crowds and kids when my counts were down. I bathed daily and dried my skin gently. I carried Neosporin around in my purse and used it on all cuts and scrapes. I wore gloves when I washed dishes (didn't do that too often because Robyn was home - thank you Robyn!!). I kept my whole body moisturized so I didn't develop any cracks or sores. I didn't eat fresh vegetables when my counts were down, and I monitored my temperature daily. I also didn't share a bathroom the whole time during my treatment. In the infusion room they have you flush twice when you use the restroom. I did that at home as well, with the lid down. My doctor also said to stay away from pet droppings - no problem!!

Fluid Retention - I got a slight amount of fluid retention. I tried to limit my salt intake so it never got unmanageable.

Appetite Changes - Yeah right. I had a few days after every infusion where I didn't eat a whole lot but I always made up for that. I would lose two pounds and gain back four. It's got to be that Italian eating gene I've inherited.

Taste Changes - This I did have, but obviously it didn't affect my appetite. I had a slight metallic taste which was caused by the Taxotere. Water starts to taste really yucky when this happens. I found that cold water tasted much better than warm water. About three weeks post chemo my taste buds were back to normal.

Bleeding Problems - Never had this one.

Urination Changes - Didn't have this one either.

Chemo Pause - This one has been a challenge and eight weeks post chemo nothing has changed. I was pretty close to being in menopause before my diagnosis. I had already gone through the night sweats and also had hot flashes on and off. I went almost a year without my monthly visit from Aunt Flo and then she returned for a couple of months and went away again. Once chemo started the night sweats and hot flashes got so much worse. I spend most of the time freezing one minute and burning up the next. This also contributes to my insomnia. There has been no sign of Aunt Flo and I don't expect a return. I haven't talked to my oncologist about this, but it's on my list for the next appointment. For now, I try to dress in layers. I feel like a chemo version Mr. Miyagi from the Karate Kid - hats on, hats off. Sorry, bad joke.

Insomnia - I suffered from insomnia long before chemo started. But I must admit, it did get worse. Usually on the nights right after the Neulasta shot and also the few days pre and post chemo when I had to take steroids. Another thing keeping me up lately has been the hot flashes. As mentioned above, chemo pause makes sleeping uncomfortable. I'm hot one minute and cold the next. I have a special hat for sleeping that's made of cotton. It's green so I call it "my little green giant hat". I spend most of the night taking it on and off. Occasionally I will wake up in a cold sweat. I've tried so many things. Luckily I don't require a lot of sleep but it sure would be nice to get a good night's rest. This is one side effect I haven't solved. I guess it deserves a chat with my oncologist. My oncology nurse said something about melatonin, but I've never tried it. I'm cautious about sleep aides because I don't want to become dependent. Thinking too much will also keep me awake. I really need an on/off switch installed on my brain. I will report back on this one when/if I find a solution.

Emotional Effects - This was also a big one for me due to past health issues. It took me awhile to wrap my head around the fact I was facing another health crisis. My doctors were very honest and told me it's possible to get Flesh Eating Bacteria again during treatment. That was/is my biggest fear. My doctor prescribed Ativan, which I took before every infusion, and sometimes before a procedure. I also took it occasionally on the nights I was stressing about treatment and possible side effects. Eight weeks post chemo and now I just take it before my Herceptin infusion. I've weaned myself off of all the prescribed cancer medications and I'm back on my RA meds. That may change once radiation starts.

It's a long list of possible side effects and it can be quite overwhelming before you start treatment. When I started chemo I was terrified. I was sure I would get every side effect - but I didn't. The ones I did get were typically pretty mild. In fact, if it wasn't for the dreaded constipation which was exacerbated by my other health issues, I think I would have come through chemo very well. Even taking that into consideration, I still think I did well. My RA pretty much went away while on it, which was wonderful. Was chemo easy? No, of course not. But it wasn't as bad as what I had envisioned. So if you're facing chemotherapy in your lifetime, it is doable. Once it's behind you, the memories will fade, and life will get back to normal. I'm eight weeks post chemo and I'm feeling pretty good. I can't speak for the long term side effects, but I'm hopeful there won't be any.

I will add to this blog post as I think of more side effects. I'm sure there must be some that I have forgotten. HMMMMMM - Chemo Brain?? :)